Tuesday, June 19, 2007
To the Queen
Two million of us and we are loosing the battle to the giant enemy of Yellow and Red. This enemy is spelling DOOM for all of us. I don’t understand it; I have been leading this battalion for 2 weeks, since the battle of Pili Pili Hill and have suffered losses at every turn. Now when we have all but won the two day battle for Knot Hole and have carried off enough of the enemy’s honey to please the Queen and are ready to retreat, this new enemy arrives from out of nowhere. It is taking a heavy toll on us and the only saving grace is the air force of our original enemy sending in suicide fighters to try to hold it off. Despite the air attack we have lost 90% of our forces and there is no reprieve in sight. I may not make it.
It has always been invasion, invasion, invasion. Never a break! Never a, “take a day off.” Invade, Kill, Conquer. Lately our forces have been devastated at every turn. I mean, the only reason I was promoted to Battalion leader is that I survived the first battle at the human nest. And the only reason I survived is that I was chatting up this little lady from the scavenger nest. The battle had taken a good number of soldiers from the colony and forced us to create a treaty with a couple of neighbouring colonies. Then after two flipping weeks of battle training, recon tours, exercises, mock invasions and very little food we sent 75% of the entire battle force, in a multi-pronged formation into the human nest. We held for a long while. The humans were tripping over themselves to stomp us. We even contracted a spitting slider to distract the enemy, but he had little effect, other than to slow the humans for a few minutes. That distraction seemed to concentrate the enemy and after they called in reinforcements and regrouped we were gassed on a massive scale.
Hiding in the crevices in their food chamber I called for my own reinforcements. They came fast, 90,000 strong, charging in formation, 6 across. Many didn’t make it to the objective and perished in the gas. As the 40,000 of us collected for a second surge of force the gas continued from every direction. The troops were panicking in the ranks and scattered even under orders to hold the line. 10 of us holed up in the command post inside an old termite tube out of the gas. As we tried to figure out our next move a few lucky scouts made in through, but their news was not good. The battle had not gone well and much of the force was wiped out, those who remained alive had retreated, wounded and lungs burning.
As Battalion leader my orders were to conquer and make it back alive. At this point I was focused on the latter. The ten of us plus the three scouts made our way back through the eerie corps filled battle field. The humans, still not battle weary had anticipated this maneuver and stomped 8 of my small party. Even with orders to freeze at the sight of the underside of a human foot panic had set in and the men scattered. I am happy to say that a couple of them died with honor after mounting the shoes and attacking directly at the base of the humans.
We did eventually, under the cover of darkness, make it back to the nest. But as we were empty handed and had lost most of the battalion, it was a sad homecoming.
It was then that I decided to send the remaining troops on a massive recon to scout out new entry points. But the humans were there with their bright shining stick and lit us up like midday. I could tell from my command post on the tree of banana that the humans employed their yellow and red can of DOOM and again took out large numbers of my troops. Again we could see a few brave souls unleashing pain to the humans before being squished. After this failed recon we gave up on the human nest and went after the honey in the knot hole bee’s nest. Even here, far from the human nest the humans came on the attack. And, now I find myself trapped and close to death. The nest is filling with gas and I shall not last much longer. I must have this message reach the Queen.
LEAVE THE HUMANS ALONE!
Good bye…
It has always been invasion, invasion, invasion. Never a break! Never a, “take a day off.” Invade, Kill, Conquer. Lately our forces have been devastated at every turn. I mean, the only reason I was promoted to Battalion leader is that I survived the first battle at the human nest. And the only reason I survived is that I was chatting up this little lady from the scavenger nest. The battle had taken a good number of soldiers from the colony and forced us to create a treaty with a couple of neighbouring colonies. Then after two flipping weeks of battle training, recon tours, exercises, mock invasions and very little food we sent 75% of the entire battle force, in a multi-pronged formation into the human nest. We held for a long while. The humans were tripping over themselves to stomp us. We even contracted a spitting slider to distract the enemy, but he had little effect, other than to slow the humans for a few minutes. That distraction seemed to concentrate the enemy and after they called in reinforcements and regrouped we were gassed on a massive scale.
Hiding in the crevices in their food chamber I called for my own reinforcements. They came fast, 90,000 strong, charging in formation, 6 across. Many didn’t make it to the objective and perished in the gas. As the 40,000 of us collected for a second surge of force the gas continued from every direction. The troops were panicking in the ranks and scattered even under orders to hold the line. 10 of us holed up in the command post inside an old termite tube out of the gas. As we tried to figure out our next move a few lucky scouts made in through, but their news was not good. The battle had not gone well and much of the force was wiped out, those who remained alive had retreated, wounded and lungs burning.
As Battalion leader my orders were to conquer and make it back alive. At this point I was focused on the latter. The ten of us plus the three scouts made our way back through the eerie corps filled battle field. The humans, still not battle weary had anticipated this maneuver and stomped 8 of my small party. Even with orders to freeze at the sight of the underside of a human foot panic had set in and the men scattered. I am happy to say that a couple of them died with honor after mounting the shoes and attacking directly at the base of the humans.
We did eventually, under the cover of darkness, make it back to the nest. But as we were empty handed and had lost most of the battalion, it was a sad homecoming.
It was then that I decided to send the remaining troops on a massive recon to scout out new entry points. But the humans were there with their bright shining stick and lit us up like midday. I could tell from my command post on the tree of banana that the humans employed their yellow and red can of DOOM and again took out large numbers of my troops. Again we could see a few brave souls unleashing pain to the humans before being squished. After this failed recon we gave up on the human nest and went after the honey in the knot hole bee’s nest. Even here, far from the human nest the humans came on the attack. And, now I find myself trapped and close to death. The nest is filling with gas and I shall not last much longer. I must have this message reach the Queen.
LEAVE THE HUMANS ALONE!
Good bye…
